Ever wonder what automatic combination of neurological forces are at work when we become angry? With the goal of our dialogue being to figure out how to better deal with anger, let’s take a look at how anger happens inside of our brain.
The brain’s emotional center
The cerebral cortex (cortex) is the thinking part of the brain where logic and judgment reside. It is the outer portion of the brain and is divided into lobes. Think of the cortex as the strategy center of the brain.
The emotional center of the brain is the limbic system. It is located lower in the brain and is considered to be more primitive than the cortex.
When someone is experiencing and expressing anger, he or she is not using the thinking (cortex) part of the brain, but primarily, the limbic center of the brain.
Have you encountered your amygdala today?
Within the limbic system is a small structure called the amygdala, a storehouse for emotional memories. It is also the area of the brain responsible for our “fight or flight” reactions, our natural survival instincts.
The data coming in from the world around us passes through the amygdala where the decision is made whether to send the data to the limbic or cortex area of the brain. If the incoming data triggers enough of an emotional charge, the amygdala can override the cortex, which means the data will be sent to the limbic system causing the person to react using the lower part of the brain.
During an overriding event, the amygdala goes into action without much regard for the consequences (since this area of the brain is not involved in judging, thinking, or evaluating). This reactive incident has come to be known as an amygdala hijacking.
Get ready for the hormones
When the amygdala is hijacked, a flood of hormones are released that cause physical and emotional alarm. A surge of energy follows, preparing the person for the fight or flight response. The impact of this hormonal flush last for several minutes during which time the person is usually out of control and may say or do things he or she will later regret, when the thinking part of the brain reengages.
Further, an additional longer-lasting hormone is released., and its impact can last for several hours to several days.
Why counting to 10 does not work
Having a long-lasting hormone in the body can explain why someone has an initial, powerful angry reaction, then seems to calm, but later has a huge flair-up that is disproportionate to the situation because of some small incident occuring while the hormone was active in the bloodstream.
On average, it can take 20 minutes for a person who has experienced an angry state of arousal to calm, to move from functioning from the emotional area to the thinking area of the brain.
A lot of stuff to digest
Perhaps we just may need to be aware that a lot goes on physiologically when we get angry.
What is important to know is:
- anger involves a trigger to the emotions that so easily charges us up that we “lose it, ” and
- it will often take about 20 minutes before we can once again become more logical.
Just knowing that could really help us as we deal with our anger or someone else’s. When we know someone is “amygdala hijacked,” then we should give him or her some time (over 20 minutes) before we attempt to resolve or discuss what happened because it takes about that long for hormonal releases to decrease in intensity.
So, if you stay with me for the next post, we will talk about how this knowledge can be used to prepare for, prevent and recover from these angry outbursts. For now, let’s just begin to observe how we see this in ourselves and others around us as we really begin to understand “this is your brain on anger!“
Gerry Vassar, President and CEO, Lakeside Educational Network
Some information taken from Understanding Anger, 2004, Diane Wagenhals.
Anne says
I am hoping you can advise me on the following problem. I am writing regarding my daughter’s live-in boyfriend. He has uncontrollable, violent, rages which are triggered by the most insignificant things. He frequently smashes furniture, his car, ANYTHING nearby.
He smokes dope and has done so for over 25 years.
He gambles all his money or buy dope and then has to hock whatever he can, to buy cigarettes or petrol etc.
Interestingly, he is able to control his violent outbursts at work or in front of other people who know him superficially.
I wonder what you make of his behaviour, and what you would suggest regarding treatment.
Kind regards,
Anne Thompson
S.I. says
Dear Anne, while I am not an expert in the sense of studying the human brain, I do know a thing or two about anger and rage and other intense emotions (and “dope”).
Judging the situation by your post only, I would assume that like with me, the dope (Marijuana/THC I assume) is causing a hormonal imbalance in his brain (I’ve experienced this myself) which intensifies his emotional states, but it is likely not the root cause. Whatever traumas shaped him in the past have taught him that the normal/effective response to frustration is anger or even physical violence or rage (Be careful! This can escalate beyond control if left untreated!!!!).
With me it was/is a defense mechanism that was pretty much partly forced upon me. In the past I was very vulnerable, insecure and open and got hurt a lot because of it because people just don’t know how to handle someone who is truthful and honest and direct. Crying didn’t help and asking for mercy didn’t either- the mental abuse (inflicted upon me) only got worse. Growing increasingly angry and yelling however did help stop it.
For 5 years I was in an abusive relationship where I developed certain undesirable traits like some of what you are describing and even after we broke up it I got very angry whenever I got hurt or when perceived injustice done to me or a loved one.
I’m still on the road to recovery and am still learning how to control myself in high intensity situations (this is easily the hardest thing I have ever had to do in life, and let me tell you I have experienced my share of hardships in my short life.)
A very long story short, I believe that the live-in-boyfriend has experienced some traumas and intense emotional states which pushed him to the extremities of human emotion (despair breeds extremism in many different ways). After witnessing that getting angry actually works he probably further developed this trait and got an increasingly shorter fuse. If you want to truly solve the problem then you must figure out what the CORE/CAUSE of this development was (a professional needs to do this, not you or me or your daughter). The outbursts are not the problem as much as they are a symptom of the problem.
But in order to get to the cause, he will need to cooperate and be willing to open up. This means he must be willing to become vulnerable again which is extremely difficult. A psychiatrist is definitely a good road to take but you must be absolutely sure that the psych in question is somebody who is experienced in treating cases like his because it’s really not something any “regular” psych would want to, or even be able to solve.
He needs a safe space where he can be himself without being afraid to be judged. He needs to feel the warmth of true uncondition al love so that he can’t use it as an excuse to grow angry anymore. If he can show his true inner self to you guys and see that he is accepted and LOVED, that will signal to him (slow process but worth it) that it’s okay to be vulnerable and open and honest because people who deserve to know the true him are not people who will fear him or hurt him.
So in my opinion a good start before you guys talk about any psych treatment would be to have a good heart-to-heart with him where you guys can make him realize that he is not only harming you guys emotionally/mentally, but that he is also further damaging himself; and realize that he is not alone anymore.
I wish with all my heart that you guys will be able to help him help himself to eventually rid himself of this weakness because that’s exactly what losing control is: a weakness that disables high-reasoning while enabling more “animalistic” behavior and thoughts that only serve to devolve the individual, not evolve.
I hope that this post helped you (even if just a little) get some insight into the mind of someone like him.
Good luck and God Bless!
IT–
Amy bassett says
I recently remembered When my son was an infant his car seat did not lock in properly resulting in him tumbling down between the seat and the door. He hit the left side of his fore head on the corner of a step in the vehicle. He has always had problems with his anger, even as a toddler. He is 15 now and the anger has gotten out of control. Resulting in him being expelled from school. Could there be a link between his injury all those years ago and his inability to manage his anger. And if so, what steps, if any can I take to help him?
Kate says
My brother also has the rages and smashing of things which is far worse if he’s been drinking.
But no drug or gambling addictions. He is a good person but overly controlled by the emotions of the moment. It makes him a pretty crap partner for his girlfriend who allows him to be like that by not leaving. I think he would have improved if the people around him had not tolerated this.
The best thing your daughter can do for herself is get out of the relationship as soon as possible – there are too many problems here for you and her to have much hope of fixing things. He needs serious ongoing professional help. And the best thing for him too might be the end or imminent end of a relationship that allows him to act like this.
Beverly Parker says
I have a 10 yr old who has anger issues. He is not consistantly angry but the intensity of the anger is my biggest concern. I would like more info regarding the limbic system and angrer.
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